I am pregnant again. Only 5 weeks along so I haven't told anyone. Only my husband, of course! After the miscarriage last fall, I'm afraid that it will happen again. I have spent most of my life dreading any illness that makes me nauseous. To me the feeling of being sick to my stomach is the worst, give me pain any day. Yet, each day I am yearning for some nausea, some evidence that my hormone levels are rising and that this pregnancy will be OK. Maybe I shouldn't be nervous because my mother had babies well into her 40s but I am afraid. I am afraid of the feeling of loss that comes with a miscarriage. I am afraid of the worry that we'll never have a child and we'll grow into old crotchety people who scare the neighborhood children.
For now, I am pregnant and I unashamedly pray each night and morning that this pregnancy will last and this child will live!
About Me
- Angel of Delusion
- Florida, United States
- The name Angela May Packard is actually a pen name. This allows me to be truly honest in my writing without fear of repercussion from loved ones who don't exactly see things the way that I do. The purpose of this blog is for my own self expression but I definitely welcome comments.
Subscribe To
Posts
Comments
3 comments:
Congratulations!
Can't pray, I don't believe ;) But I sincerely hope you will have a beautiful and healthy baby.
My friend miscarried before having a cute little baby boy last year. Please, don't be too scared during your pregnancy and don't hesitate to talk about any worries you may have. My friend was very worried for 9 months given the circumstances but she was able to overcome that by talking with doctors and enjoyed her pregnancy after all.
Your hopefully thoughts are all I need. Thank you for the reassurance. I think I will feel better when I'm far enough along to get an ultrasound and see the baby's heart beating.
I'm sure you will and I certainly cross my fingers for you.
Let us know!
Post a Comment