The Bag Lady Stories

Earlier this week I was browsing around Zhu's blog and saw a meme that she had done. It was the "What's in your bag" meme. I loved it!! I ended up following the links to all the people she had tagged and on to some people they had tagged. Maybe I'm nosy or something but I thought it was a lot of fun. I was absolutely rolling when I saw this meme done by "the frogster" on the blog The Frog Bog.

I take the bus to work and sometimes I'm carrying several bags with me. So, I willingly refer to myself as the "Bag Lady" on those days. I feel that there is a "bag for every purpose and a purpose for every bag". Here are the stories of all my bags.

The yoga bag:



Pearl art supply stores were having a promotion where if you bought enough big things like 3 foot by 4 foot sheets of picture matting they gave you a free bag. Well, I wanted the bag because my yoga mat was really a camping mat (the kind you sleep on when camping) and it was big. I liked my camping/yoga mat because it was softer than the traditional yoga mat and my knees hurt if I don't have some cushioning. Well, fortunately my husband needed to buy some matting for his photos and I got the bag!!

The beach bag:



This bag was a gift from some very good friends. Not only is it my favorite color but it is also the perfect size for a bag a snacks, a beach towel, something to drink and a book. It is also OK to wash this bag in the washing machine so it really is perfect for going to the beach.

The Sunday school bag:










It was a Christmas gift from our host daughter an exchange student from Thailand. it is just the right size for my scriptures, the lesson manuals and a notebook for me to capture great ideas. My husband claims that I'm planning on starting a church of my own and that's why I'm taking notes. I particularly like to take this bag to church because the little babies are fascinated by the flashy decorations. This gives me a chance to play with the baby. That totally distracts me from taking notes but it is so much more fun.

The Toastmasters bag:
This bag isn't actually from the Toastmaster's organization it is just the bag I use to keep all my Toastmaster's stuff together. This bag was part of the new employee package at my current job. You could probably tell that it was a "gift" from the health insurance providers who were competing for the new employees' attention. This past weekend I celebrated my five year anniversary working for the same organization. I moved to a different department about six months ago to escape the Dr. Evil boss otherwise I wouldn't have made it to five years.

Miscellaneous other bags:
This is an assortment of bags that I use occasionally. The little black and brown bag I picked up in Thailand because I needed something small to carry a little cash, my Thai to English book, a cell phone and some chap stick. I still use it any time I just need to carry a few things with me and a pants pocket just isn't big enough. The white bag with pink handles is for sneaking popcorn into the movies. It is a very specialized bag. My sister gave it to me and I just haven't found any other purpose for it. The black bag with the beautiful needle work on it was purchased in Laos and it is the bag I carry with me when I'm following my husband around on one of his photography outings. Because he spends so much time getting just the right shot, I need something to do. I'll carry a book, some water and anything else to keep me entertained while I wait.

The very, very special bag:

This bag is a very special bag because I searched for it and I found not just what I was looking for but I found what my heart desired. I wanted a sleek purse that could keep me organized. Something that was set up for my planner but had space for a cell phone, all my credit cards, and a pen. Then I found the perfect bag and even better they had the style in red!! However this bag was supposed to be for work and I need to look professional. Red is not a conservative color and I have been raised a conservative. The dilemma was heart wrenching. I picked up the black purse and looked it over. I picked up the red purse and put it back. I started to the register with the black one and then went back for the red one. I started at it for awhile. Red will definitely not match my clothes every day. I'm really not the type of person who will change my purse to match my clothes. Usually I just have a black purse so it isn't a problem. But I really, really like the red purse. Well, as you can see, I did buy the red purse. It is such a beautiful purse.

After several years of enjoying my beautiful red purse, I noticed that more often than not it was getting shoved into my larger work bag because I just had too many things to carry. I now have a Blackberry so I don't need the paper planner and I found a small coin purse that fits my driver's license, some credit cards and some cash. So, now the red purse only comes out when I need to look professional and it's the only bag I'm going to carry. (i.e. job interviews)

The work bag:

It is a big black bag that carries everything I could possibly fit into it. It was acquired at a technology conference which is apparent from the not subtle advertising across the front. Everything in this bag is absolutely essential. There is the umbrella for the always expected Florida rain, my little red bag for my makeup because I never have time to apply it before I leave the house so I do it on the bus on my way to work, my pink Clinique bag for discretely carrying unmentionables, a couple of books to read while I'm riding the bus and my work notebook because I occasionally feel like working on something even when I'm not at work. There is the miscellaneous little stuff like my employee id, my blackberry with wired ear piece (wireless ear pieces cost too much!!), a few pills, some hydro-cortizone (I think that got left in there one day when I had an annoying bug bite), and various papers which were at one time very important (they had to have been or I wouldn't have kept them).

There is more story behind this bag. At the technology conference where I got the bag, one of the tech companies had a party and hired an artist to draw caricatures of people as super heros. Wonder Woman was always my favorite super hero so of course I had the artist draw me as Wonder Woman.



Now, if I had a cool little invisible airplane too keep all my stuff in I wouldn't need so many bags. Well, maybe just one or two.

I'm going to tag: Amel, Victorya, and The Pioneer Woman

Preventing the Sexual Abuse of Children

As promised back in September, I am posting some additional information on child sexual abuse. I actually gave a speech today in my Toastmasters Club on the topic so here is the information I prepared for that.

Here are some statistics that I got from the Darkness To Light website:
- Before age 18 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 6 boys will be sexually abused
- There are 39 million survivors of sexual abuse in the United States
- 90% of sexually abused children are victimized by people they know
- 40% of sexual abuse cases have a perpetrator who is an older or larger child
- The median age of sexual abuse is 9 years old
- 70 to 80% of abused children have substance abuse problems as they get older
- 50% of abused boys have suicidal thoughts
- 60% of teen pregnancies are preceded by sexual abuse

A frightening statistic that I got from the website Keep Your Child Safe says that 1 in 20 adults have pedophile tendencies!

Now that I have scared the "you know what" out of you, how can we prevent child sexual abuse. Prevention is made difficult by the following factors: 80% of sexual abuse occurs in one-on-one situations and since parents think they can identify a perpetrator they don't worry about leaving their child alone with a "trusted" adult. Also, most children are naive about sex and sexual boundaries because their parents are uncomfortable talking about it. Parents also assume their child will tell them if they are abused.

Most importantly AVOID ONE-ON-ONE SITUATIONS WITH A CHILD!! Forgive the "screaming" but it is so simple that I had to emphasize the point. Don't be alone with a child and don't leave your child alone with any adult. When a one-on-one situation can not be avoided (the Darkness to Light website indicates that normal one-on-one time is good for a child's self esteem) make sure that some basic rules are followed.
- Get specifics about the plans
- Public places are best
- Drop in unexpectedly
- Notice your child’s behavior and response to questions when they return
- Announce that you and your child are educated about sexual abuse

Don't fall victim to the common misconception of a perpetrator who is the sulking man in a trench coat in the park. Sexual Abuse Perpetrators look and act “normal” and they very careful “groom” children for abuse. "Grooming" includes gaining the trust of parents and exposing the child to inappropriate talk and behavior slowly so that suspicions are not raised. Some parents worry that talking to their children about sex will take away their innocence. When handled appropriately talk about sex makes the child comfortable with their bodies and encourages them to continue talking with their parents. Most importantly it allows parents to teach their children sexual boundaries so that a perpetrator can not exploit the child's naivity. Children need to be told that abusers may be people he/she knows.

The misconception parents have that their children will tell them if they are abused, couldn't be more wrong. Children are more likely to tell a trusted adult other than a parent. Perpetrators of abuse use many tactics to ensure the child doesn’t tell. They threaten the child and his/her family. They tell the child it is their fault and how disappointed everyone will be if they knew. They will also tell the child that there is nothing wrong with the abuse, it is just a game. It's no wonder that when children do tell someone of the abuse they only share limited information to gauge the reaction.

Because of the child's hesitancy it is important how you react. It is critical that you remain observant of your child's behavior. Notice different or inappropriate behavior in your child and explore the reason why he/she is exhibiting this behavior. It is critical that you remain calm and objective. If the child senses that you are agitated, emotional or angry they will shut down. Children have a tendency to blame themselves and they don't want to make trouble. This is why the negative emotions can be scary for the child even if those emotions are not directed at the child. Ask open-ended questions of the child in a non-threatening way. Remember that only 1 to 4% of all reported sexual abuse cases are based on false accusations. So, your child is telling the truth make sure you acknowledge that because he/she needs your support.

Report any incidents of abuse and act on suspicions. The Darkness to Light website provided many resources for reporting abuse, getting assistance for abused children and even just to ask questions or help evaluating suspicions. Just one of those numbers is the National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453

The statistics indicate that sexual abuse among children is of epidemic proportions. It is so important that we do all we can to stop this tragedy. Support organizations which work to prevent child abuse and support victims. One of the most valuable things that you can do is talk about the problem. If everyone got over their fears and discomfort regarding this subject many of the misconceptions wouldn't exist. The more educated people are the less likely they will be to leave an opporutnity for their child to be sexually abused.

Back from Blogging Hiatus

So do you know what hiatus means? I didn't until I moved to Florida and started living near a road called Hiatus. Then at some point I was told that the road was called Hiatus because it was supposed to be the last road before the Everglades. It was the end of the development. Well, I live west of Hiatus so the road was not the end of development it was just an interruption in the development. So, the road is aptly named.

I was thinking about this because I got tagged for excellence by Heaven Above at Wildlife Alive and I was really touched by her concern for the animals who have lost their habitat to the humans. Much of South Florida sits on what used to be the Everglades so occasionally there are some incidents with wildlife. Some of the wildlife has adapted fairly well to us humans but others are just too threatening to the average human. Just like the bears that Heaven Above writes about the alligators here sometimes get a bad reputation. In the end, they are just trying to survive.

So, Heaven Above tagged my post Another Day in Paradise for excellence because it made her laugh. I'm so glad for that. On some of the really tough days at my previous employer, I would tell my friends that I have to laugh because otherwise I'd cry. Ever felt that way?

Now time for me to tag someone else for excellence.

I have to tag Zhu at Correr Es Mi Destino for her excellent post Losing my Religion. I am a religious person and I just loved the respectful debate that this post created.

The only thing is; I was so hooked on reading this post and all the comments that I ran out of time to find other bloggers to tag. I would suggest that you check out any of the blogs in the list "My Favorite Blogs".

I do hope that I'll be able to get back to blogging regularly. I have so many ideas for posts, I just wish I had time for them all.

Please Pass The Pink Penguin!!

I received a ‘Pink Penguin’ from Choc Mint Girl as part of ‘Breast Cancer Awareness’ month. I'm quite happy to pass the Pink Penguin on.



I'm posting it today, but I'll do the passing another day. Unfortunately, I'm not being a very good blogger. I'm recovering from the mad rush to complete my project at work. My brain is mush while my body is taking exception to the fact that I have to continue going to work. I'll be taking vacation in a week and a half that I've very much looking forward to it.

The following are four points, recommended by Pelf that you can do to help during Breast Cancer Awarness Month:

1. Spread the word. Announce the event on your blog. You could write a blog post (like this), or a little note about it. Whatever you choose to do, just go ahead and tell your readers about it.

2. Go pink. Modify your theme if you know how to, or get yourself a pretty pink theme. If you run a website, turn your website pink. But if you don’t like pink, you could still participate by putting up a badge on your sidebar.

3. Design badges and banners. Design a couple of “Pink for October” badges or banners for other participants to use (for free) and to publicize the event. Some of the existing badges and banners can be downloaded from the Official Pink for October Site.

4. Design blog themes. There are a lot of bloggers (me included) who can’t even do simple designing, so if you are good at it, perhaps you could design and release a few pink themes?

If you are reading this post, please do something to spread the awareness. It only takes a moment of your time.

Thank you!!

My Desktop

Choc Mint Girl tagged me for this meme. It's pretty simple, show a picture of my desktop. I'm afraid my desktop isn't very interesting.



See, I haven't changed it much since I bought this computer from Dell! Well, hopefully some of the folks that I tag will have more interesting desktops.

Here are the rules:

Upon receiving this tag, immediately perform a screen capture of your desktop. It is best that no icons be deleted before the screen capture so as to add to the element of fun. Here’s how you can do a screen capture:

1. Go to your desktop and press the Print Scrn key (located on the right side of the F12 key).
2. Open a graphics program (like Picture Manager, Paint, or Photoshop) and doing a Paste (CTRL + V). If you wish, you can “edit” the image before saving it.
3. Post the picture on your blog. You can also give a short explanation on the look of your desktop if you want. You can explain why you prefer such a look or why it is full of icons. Things like that.
4. Tag five of your friends and ask them to give you a Free View of their desktops as well.
5. Add your name to this list of Free Viewers with a link pointing directly to your Desktop Free View post to promote it to succeeding participants.

People who have already pimped their desktop:
Francine of La Place de Cherie Chez Francine Bloggishi Unchained Melody LadyJava’s Lounge Mariuca Revellian Dot ComDesktop Emila’s Illustrated Blog Spiff, The Spaceman Rolando Brown Baron The Kat HouseMAX Choc Mint Girl Self Delusions of Angela May add yours here after doing this tag

I tag the following great bloggers:
Victorya Chase Goes to Therapy
Mel's Got An Idea
JenuArt - Soul Energy Rising
Kathleen's Invisible Keepsakes
Flavors of Italy

Blogging Against Abuse

Well, I wasn't planning on posting today. However, I took a moment to visit some of my favorite blogs and noticed a badge on Victorya's blog for the Blogging Against Abuse Day sponsored by the Blog Catalog site. I couldn't pass up the opportunity to participate and support a cause that I care a lot about.



I am particularly passionate about stopping child abuse because I feel that abusing a child is among the worst crimes/sins that can be committed. I agree wholeheartedly with the verse in Luke (17:2) "It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones."

When I traveled in South East Asia, I was horrified to learn how many children in those countries are sold as sex slaves. The biggest customers are Western tourists. The statistics regarding abuse in America is staggering as well. If it weren't way past my bedtime (I need my 8 hours), I would spend some time to track down the most recent statistics. I think I'll follow-up with that information in another post.

Another note as well. Since I have recently extracted myself from a difficult job with a horrible work environment, I acknowledge that abuse comes in many forms. Anyone who has had a tyranical boss knows what I'm talking about. It is abusing to use power to manipulate and control people. Also, we abuse someone anytime we treat them disrespectfully or put ourselves above others.

I think sometimes I am guilty of this as well. I can be very disdainful of my former boss and her cronies who have inflicted so much unhappiness on so many people. I want to believe that is just "righteous indignation". Is it really or is that just an excuse?

To quote the bible once again in John 13:34 it says: "A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another." Can you imagine what the world would be like if everyone loved everyone else the way that Christ loved? I want to experience a world like that!

Check out all the blogs that participated. Most of them are much better written than my little post. Bloggers Unite & Make a Difference

Just for Fun

Look, I'm actually posting twice in one week!! This is an accomplishment for me because I have been so busy. There are two reasons I'm posting unexpectedly.

First, I have gotten a few comments on my last post from my blogger friends. I just wanted to let everyone know that you don't need to feel bad about the Lyric Contest. The fun thing about blogging is that you can try something new out. Sometimes it will work and sometimes it doesn't. It's all good, because this is how we learn to be better bloggers and better people too!

So, now for the second reason. I'm nearing the end of this do or die project at work and for the first time in 6 weeks I haven't had to work overtime for two days in a row. The web application that I built from scratch in 6 weeks (I'm very proud of myself), has been approved to be released!! With that obstacle behind me, this little picture that I received from a friend is all the more appropriate!



Today, I was also admiring Zhu's new blog and thinking that my blog could use some work. Ever hear the adage that the shoe makers children never have shoes? Well, it applies to programmers too. The stuff I build for myself is never as nice as the stuff I do at work. I'm too tired by the time I get home!! Anyway, Zhu's blog is looking beutiful as always!

It's a Flop

The Lyric Contest that is. Yes, it was abysmally unsuccessful. I had a couple of encouraging comments but no entries in the contest. I am attempting to write some lyrics myself but my rhyming capabilities seem to be limited to words with four letters or less. For instance:

My contest was a flop
but I will not stop
until I am on top

It rhymes but it also stinks. So, I will continue to welcome any suggestions.

I realize that some of my difficultly is a result of being mentally drained after working so much lately. As I am writing this post, I am actually more interested in visiting blogs than I am writing. Visiting requires less thought.

Old Things under the Sun has some interesting thoughts on immigration.

Hobo Teacher is making me rethink my desire to have children. Teaching high school has got to be the worst job ever.

Well, I'm going end this post on what I would call a high note. The evil boss character in the "Another Day in Paradise" musical is based on an actual person who was formerly my boss. I escaped some time ago. I just received word that this person has been fired. Although it might seem very unchristian like, I couldn't help but join in enthusiasm that has overtaken my friends who had remained.

I actually received an email with a dancing leprechaun and the music "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead".

Lyrics Writing Contest

Well, work has been particularly brutal the last few weeks and I'm expecting more of the same through September. This is what happens when my boss makes great promises and like a dope I agree that it can be done. So now I'm getting it done by any means possible, which at the moment is working lots of overtime and on occasion praying to the great computer gods that miraculously it will all just work.

So, this Sunday instead of writing the second scene of Another Day in Paradise I am enlisting the help of all Bloggers. In the first scene, there is a song that I just threw together some lyrics and I received the comment that the lyrics need some work. I agree. However, I'm not really good at it and lately my brain has been completely fried by the time I come home. The end result is that I have nothing in the way of new and better lyrics.

I am going to have a Lyrics Writing Contest and the winner of this contest will get their lyrics posted on this blog and will get the adorable emblem below that they can post on their blog.



If that isn't enough incentive to participate in the contest, how about doing it just because it will be fun?

All of us have at one time experienced a boss who seems more like a dictator, a sadist or fill in the blank with any description that you've used for a horrible boss. This is an opportunity to express your feeling about those horrible bosses in an amusing way! Take a look at the original post: Another Day in Paradise - The Musical and see if you can capture the spirit of the scene in the lyrics. Keep in mind that this musical is supposed to be very satirical. This particular scene is introducing the boss and the boss' croonies who are quite happy with their lives and really enjoy tormenting their employees. They really don't care about actual success, they just like the fancy title and looking good to all their friends.

So, the rules are:
1. Entries must be submitted through the comments by September 20, 2007 and I will announce the winner some time before October 1, 2007. It all depends on how many entries I get and how much time I have to evaluate the entries.
2. Comments containing entries will not be published on this blog until a winner is decided. I will periodically post comments confirming receipt of entries.
3. Any entries that are inappropriate (as decided by me because after all this is my blog and my contest) will be disqualified and immediately deleted. If you are wondering what would be considered inappropriate, keep in mind that I'd like to keep a "PG" rating for my blog.

Any questions, just leave a comment and I will respond. Have fun all you creative bloggers! I can't wait to see what y'all cook up on this one!

Tagging People for Priceless Experiences

OK, not too many people jumping at the chance to participate in this meme. Of course, it could be that I just don't have the level of readership that would allow for replies in three days.

So, here are some folks that I'm tagging.

Amel at Amel's Realm probably has cool experiences from both Indonesia and Finland.

Jovi at Girl, Interrupted is from the Philippines.

Let's get a New York perspective from Victorya at Victorya Chase Goes to Therapy. I always like reading Victorya's blog it is very thought provoking. Check out a past post about the Sexualizing of Children. This is a concerning trend.

OK, that's all for now.

Seven Priceless Experiences in South Florida

Well, this is another tagging game which Zhu of Correr Es Mi Destino started. I am really glad Zhu tagged me because otherwise I would be writing the second scene to the Another Day in Paradise. It isn't that I don't want to write the second scene but at the moment I have so many ideas floating around my head that I haven't been able to write anything coherent.

Zhu of course started the meme with Ten Priceless Canadian Experiences. I am from Florida, USA but I decided to be specific to South Florida with my 7 experiences. That's because South Florida is really different from the northern part of the state and in many ways different from the United States in general. I really couldn't come up with 10, but if I think of any more I'll add them.

1. Diversity and more Diversity
I really enjoy the diversity of South Florida. I have a wide range of friends from many countries, cultures, religions, etc. It's great to have conversations with them and learn about their experiences. It's like visiting a different country without leaving home.

2. Really Bad Traffic
This is one I hate! The traffic problem in South Florida is more than just the amount of cars on the road, which is a problem in itself. Some of the traffic problems do relate to the diversity I like so well because you do have folks who don't quite adjust to the US traffic laws. Even worse though are the people who do know the traffic laws and blatantly disobey them. It is very common for people to run red lights. In fact, if you are coming up on a yellow light and think you should stop you have to look behind you first. If there is a car behind you, you have to decide if it is better to go through the yellow almost red light or risk being rear-ended. Sometimes the very people who are supposed to be enforcing the traffic laws are violating them. Yes, I have nearly been run down by a police car while I was trying to cross the road.

3. The Weather is Great!! (except for hurricanes)
Why do you think so many people put up with the threat of having their houses blown away? The winter months are the best. While the rest of the country is shoveling snow we have the windows open letting in the cool breezes. The summer can sometimes be a bit unbearable with the heat and humidity. However, most of the time we have some nice winds coming off the ocean which cools things down a bit and everywhere you go is air conditioned.

4. Hurricanes are the Pits!!
Well, we lived through Hurricane Wilma which we thought was a category 3 but found out later that it was a category 2. That is because the wind speeds weren't sustained, whatever that means. All the same, when the wind was blowing I would put my hand on the walls of my house and I could feel them vibrating. My house is a cinder block house and very well built so the fact that the walls were vibrating caused me a bit of concern. My husband and I watched from the little window in our door as the winds uprooted a couple of huge trees and tipped them over on our neighbor's house. When it was all over, one of the neighborhood kids commented that our street looked like a scene from the movie War of the Worlds. I can only imagine how horrible Hurricane Katrina was.

5. Tropical Fruit: Avocados, Mangoes, Lynchees, etc.
It's great all the different kinds of fruit you can get here. The best part is that it is grown locally. It's not the tasteless fruit that's been picked early and ripened while it is shipped to the grocery store. Of course, you can get that kind of fruit here too. So, during the summer I get all the avocados and mangoes I can eat because I have trees. Sometimes I get lynchees from friends who have a tree. I'm not crazy about papaya and star fruit, but I could get those from friends too. For many years backyard citrus was disappearing because of the citrus canker and you couldn't buy citrus trees. That restriction has been lifted so maybe I'll buy an orange tree. Even if I don't there are shops everywhere that sell fresh oranges of all varieties. It's really wonderful.

6. Great International Restaurants
The diversity of the population ensures that there are a lot of authentic restaurants from the countries represented by the population. We have a couple of Thai restaurants that we love. We've also been to a good Venezuelan restaurant. We're not particularly fond of Cuban food, but there are Cuban restaurants on nearly every corner. Other restaurants that I've enjoyed include Italian, Japanese, Greek and so many more that I haven't tried yet.

7. Enduring Jokes about the 2002 Elections
I can't tell you how many times I've heard "So, you're from Florida. What was going on with the election?" So, now we have these computerized voting machines and every election there are debates about the reliability of these machines. Our local county government spent all this money on buying the machines and now some voters want to retrofit the machines to print a paper receipt. I'm not sure what good a paper receipt would do. If what is printed is not what you voted for then I guess you could make a stink about it. But a piece of paper isn't going to guarantee that the vote is counted. Occasionally, we hear about the votes in a machine not being counted properly for one reason or another. In reality, it's the same problem that elections have always had. With paper ballots, it was possible that a box full of ballots got lost and were never counted. Then there is that whole hanging chad thing. One friend told me that Florida's state quarter should be a nickel. Just count it five times!

OK, I don't know who to tag for this one. So, here's my idea. If you'd like to participate in this meme, leave a comment so that people can follow it to your blog. Over the next few days, I'll tag a few people as well.

So, ends my weekend. I spent most of my Sunday afternoon browsing the blogs Zhu listed for this meme. You should check it out, a lot of interesting blogs. I'm happy to be one of them.

Introduction to Another Day in Paradise

I think I've mentioned before that I'd like to try my hand at writing. The "Another Day in Paradise" is based on an idea that some fellow co-workers and I have been joking about for some time. It's like the Office Space movie in a Broadway Musical format.

Honestly, I'm not sure it's any good. My husband read it and only laughed at the part where I used a swear word. Yes, I'm breaking my own rules. But, it isn't used meanly or crudely so I indulged.

My husband also wouldn't say much about his thoughts. I think he is afraid to hurt my feelings. I can understand his dilemma because if he hurts my feelings he has to live with me until I get over it. So, he'd much rather that I hear from the people on the blogosphere that my writing stinks.

So, I'm asking. Don't hold back tell me what you think and if you have any suggestions for improvement. That's what I really want to read!

Thanks all!

Another Day in Paradise (The Musical - Scene 1)

You are sitting in a theater on Broadway (of course), the other patrons are slowly making their way to their seats. The lights begin to dim, signaling the start of the show. There is still no rush to settle down and noises of people finding their seats continue as the music begins. Annoyed shushes are ignored as people persisted in chatting and laughing with their companions. The curtains rise and one by one the remaining silhouettes disappear as people finally take their seats.

The music starts slow with a heavy beat that is reminiscent of a funeral march. Not exactly what you expected from a musical called “Another Day in Paradise”. The dimly lit stage enhances the mood of despair created by the music. The stage is set as a series of partitioned work areas common to the modern offices. Faceless workers shuffle on stage muttering what might be words of greeting to each other only without any sincerity. One worker in particular is dressed in long black robes with a hood covering his head. The music swells and the beat picks up. It quickly starts to more resemble a swelling buoyant song that might accompany a dance number. At that moment the robed worker throws off the robes and jumps atop a nearby chair. He belts out the words “It’s just another day in Paradise!”

“Life is grand, when you’re in command!”
“Workers snivel at your feet and you know that life is sweet!”

The other workers are frozen in place hesitant about what to do next. The beat of the song is contagious and one worker is surreptitiously tapping a foot.

Two more robed workers stroll quickly on stage, throw off their robes and continue the song.

“Yes, it’s another day in Paradise”
“When you’re friends with the boss and you know he won’t get cross!”

The first robed worker (minus the robe) continues on.

“In my Paradise, everyone thinks I’m nice.”
“I have a motivational program to show how good I am.”

A banner above the cubicles unfurls it reads.

Scott Hammond Information Technology
When you have technology troubles call SHIT

In a non-singing voice the singer says “That’s me Scott Hammond, this is my company!”

Continuing in his song, Scott glides around the stage. The two other formerly robed workers have gotten everyone dancing around Scott.

Scott: “And it’s just another day in Paradise”

“Another day in Paradise” reply the workers throwing their hands into the air.

Scott: “Life is grand, when you’re in command”

Workers: “When you’re in command”

Scott: “I answer to no one and life is fun!”

Workers: “Life is fun!”

Scott: “Everyone is happy because they work for me!”

Workers: “We’re happy because we work for you”

As the final words slip from the lips of the workers someone shouts “Not!!” The Scott character stops mid glide and swirls around. “Who said that?” The workers are suddenly sullen. Scott picks up a stray umbrella and begins hitting the workers. The two formerly robed workers are quick to grab escaping workers and push them back towards Scott where they get whacked with the umbrella. Finally, all the workers get past and huddle at their desks in the background. Scott glares angrily at the workers with his two helpers on either side.

Finally, Scott twirls his umbrella with a broad smile and sings one final phrase “It’s just another day in Paradise!!” He contentedly strolls off stage while the two helpers remain clapping profusely. They then turn to the workers and busy themselves reviewing work and scolding the workers.

The curtains slowly fall over the scene.

Another Tagging Game

So, Choc Mint Girl tagged me again. This tagging game is providing blogging tips so, here's the scoop.

--Start Copy--

It’s very simple. When this is passed on to you, copy the whole thing, skim the list and put a * star beside those that you like. (Check out especially the * starred ones.)

Add the next number (1. 2. 3. 4. 5., etc.) and write your own blogging tip for other bloggers.

Try to make your tip general. After that, tag 10 other people. Link love some friends!

Just think– if 10 people start this, the 10 people pass it onto another 10 people, you have 100 links already!

1. Look, read, and learn.
http://www.neonscent.com***

2. Be EXCELLENT to each other.
http://www.bushmackel.com****

3. Don’t let money change ya!
http://www.therandomforest.info****

4. Always reply to your comments
http://chattiekat.com***

5. Blog about what you know & love.
http://sugar-queens-dream.blogspot.com***

6. Don't use filthy language-buy a dictionary.
http://shinade.blogspot.com**

7. Whenever possible, spread some positive thoughts and love. The world needs more of them.
http://ailema4ever.blogspot.com**

8. Write down from your heart or head. Either way asks yourself why you ever get started.
http://chocmintgirl.blogspot.com

9. Be honest, be tactful but honest.
http://angelofdelusion.blogspot.com

--End Copy--

This time I'm tagging:
1. Bizzy Girl's World
2. Heaven Above
3. TL Corners
4. Victorya
5. Adrienne
6. Rollie
7. Lizzie
8. Jovi
9. Helmsdeep
10. Sirprizeme1393

Some of these blogs are ones that I visit regularly, some are folks that left comments on my blog and others are ones I found expressly so I could tag them. I did chose blogs that interested me and kept me reading beyond one paragraph.

I hope everyone enjoys the tips as well as the blogs I've tagged. I found the "After the Love is Gone" post on Jovi's site to be hilarious!

Distraction Kills Children

I actually have other things that I planned to post, but I saw an article on Excite News that I just have to say something about.

Sentences Vary When Kids Die in Hot Cars

The article tells the story of a father who simply forgot to take his daughter inside when he got home and had so many things going on that he didn't think about her for 7 hours. I know that our initial thoughts are "How could a responsible adult let that happen?".

I don't have children so the only example I have is something I forgot at work yesterday. I have a very important task to do before I left work. It was simple enough, run a report from our system before the weekend when the system would be taken down for maintenance. I had prepared for this all week sending out emails to users warning about the system outage and how they had to have their data entered before I ran the report. Then halfway through the bus ride home, I gasped as I realized I hadn't run the report. I was on a commuter bus so there was no way I could go back and the system would be taken off line in just 30 minutes. Fortunately, I called around until I found someone who was available to run the report for me. I owe the person donuts or something for saving my "bacon".

The reason I share this recent experience is because I can understand how a mind can become so crowded with thoughts that the important things can get pushed out. Anyone with ADD can understand what I'm talking about. Yes, I have ADD and I went through several years of treatment and therapy to learn how to train my brain around the things that make ADD difficult. Having a crowded brain which is easily distracted is one of those difficulties. The thing is ADD can be a temporary condition for anyone that is experiencing a particularly busy or stressful day. So, anyone could forget something as important as their own child.

As I read the article, I was thinking "this could happen to me". I can remember the complete story of a movie that I watched when I was 6 years old but I would as the cliche goes "forget my head if it weren't attached". It is a frightening thought. My only defense from such a tragedy would be to practice something that I learned to cope with ADD in general. Repitition; create a habit of checking and to create such a habit you have to check every time. In a way, it is like learned obsessive complusion. So, if I had children I would check the car seat every time I got out of the car even if I thought I didn't have the children with me.

What does it take? 2 seconds?

So, I have been tagged again on another fun activity. Maybe I'll do that tomorrow.

I got Tagged ... Twice!!!

It's like a chain email only it's with blogs. Anyway, there are rules I'm supposed to follow and one of the rules is that I have to put the rules first.

The Rules: "Each person posts the rules before their list, then they list 8 things about themselves. At the end of the post, that person tags and links to 8 other people and then visits those peoples' sites and comments letting them know that they have been tagged, and to come read the post, so they know what they have to do."

I'm not one for passing on chain emails but this tagging thing seemed like a good way to tell other people about my blog as well as sharing some blogs that I enjoy. I got tagged by Choc Mint Girl and Heaven Above. Now maybe I'm supposed to do 16 of everything because I got tagged twice but I had a hard enough time just doing 8!

1. I often have very dark thoughts that I find somewhat disturbing because I really am a very optimistic person. I think this has to do with having some very dark experiences so I know how brutal life can be but I also know how resilient we all are and that life is so worth it!

2. I love to touch rose petals. They are so soft and delicate.

3. Although I am a technology nerd, I don't own every new gadget. I'm really cheap that way and I will only buy the gadgets I really have a use for and by that time there are newer and better gadgets out.

4. I desparately want to have a child; my husband isn't sure he wants kids. I love my husband and we have a wonderful relationship. I knew about his concern regarding kids when we got married (many years ago) and at the time I honestly thought that I could deal with it. In many ways, this is more challenging than anything else I've dealt with in my life. It is so much easier when there is someone you can blame and hate; a "bad" person.

5. The song "The Greatest Love of All" is my theme song.

6. When I was 12 or 13 I was introduced to Rock and Roll (the members of my family are Country Music folks) and I loved it. One day, my mother caught me jumping on my bed, head banging and singing "Shout, Shout, let it all out" at the top of my lungs. I suspect that she thought I was possessed.

7. Wonder Woman was my hero. I wanted to be able to fight the bad guys the way she did. Beat the crap out of them but still be a lady.

8. A group of my co-workers and I like to joke about writing a musical based on the crazy things that happen at our work. Perhaps, I'll post the opening scene as my next entry!

So, there are the 8 things about myself. Now for the 8 bloggers that I'll be tagging.

1. Correr Es Mi Destino
2. Bizzy Girl's World
3. Herbal Renaissance
4. Amel's Realm
5. Mollotov Cocktail
6. Culumovic
7. Ramblings
8. It's Like You Know ...

For all of you who are following the tag chain, happy blog browsing and happy blogging!

The Curse of Cussing

After I posted my last blog entry, it was as if the heavens either conspired against me or decided to test my resolve. I just got slammed with things to do! I had a house guest for two weeks, had a few nights of overtime at work, was asked to create some little origami flowers as gifts for the new members of my women's club and I was elected to the position of Vice President of Education in my Toastmaster's club.

The problem with being self-deluded is that you believe you can accomplish 30 hours worth of stuff in the 24 hour day!

So, I finally got back to blogging and I really enjoyed following the links left by the people who commented on my posts. I love the comments and I really enjoyed the blogs! And anytime I start reading blogs, I follow interesting links from one blog to another and find my way through a maze of topics and interests. It is like heaven for someone with a short attention span!

As I read along, I became aware of a trend that is not unique to blogging. The occasional sometimes frequent use of the "F" word. I'm sure that some people will think that I am very conservative or hyper-religious or whatever. Think what you may. I do not like that word! I hear it more and more in movies, in music on the street. To me it is "fingernails on the chalkboard". It represents all the horrible types of sexual intercourse; abuse, rape, incest, etc. So when someone says "FU" it is like they are wishing all those horrible things on the other person.

I just don't understand why people want to use such a disgusting word. In most cases, it isn't necessary. It doesn't help the story line, or make the point. In my opinion it detracts. It degrades the person who uses it.

I certainly am not perfect when it comes to cussing. I've been known to occasionally use the less offensive four-letter words. I'm trying to stop use them all together. When I was very young, I learned at least one swear word from my dad who used them on occasion when the cows just weren't cooperating. Over the years he replaced the four-letter words with more creative expression to please my mother who really disliked any foul language.

I think I'll start using those expressions ...

Grab all Friday!
Great Caesar's Ghost!
Cotton Pickin'!

Then there was my grandmother's ... Fooey! (different inflections of the voice while saying this expletive created different meanings)

And my mother's ... Fiddle Sticks!

Perhaps I'll make up my own ...

What a pile of nibbily bits!
Goofy and Mickey!

Or quote cartoon characters like Sylvester the Cat ... Suffering Succotash!

I guess my point is that cussing is really not necessary and having a funny cuss word to say really relieves tension much better than an actual cuss word. It would also get everyone to smile!

**UPDATE 8-6-14 - It is interesting how my opinions have changed.  I have lived such a sheltered life that I rarely interacted with people that didn't share my same beliefs or more correctly the beliefs I'd been raised with.  When I have been put in situations to interact with people who were different from me, I quickly dropped my prejudices as I came to see that they were generally good people.  I'd literally been brainwashed to think that anyone who didn't conform to the beliefs I was taught as a child was evil.  That included myself which explains why I've always struggled with guilt and a feeling that I was evil.  Pretty fucked up in my opinion.

Do I have time to Blog?

Here I am, it's 10:00 pm and really time for me to be in bed because I have to go to work in the morning. I've been thinking about a post I wanted to make for the last four days and just haven't gotten around to it. Too many things in my real life to be done.

So tonight, I sit down at the computer to look at what is left on my ever expanding "to do" list and since that is kind of discouraging I easily get distracted checking my email. In one email the title of an article catches my eye: "Five Sensible Tips for Achieving Work-Life Balance" Could this article contain the precious nugget of knowledge that will make all my dreams come true?

Unfortunately not. It is not that the suggestions weren't good. Almost all of them made sense to me, except for the one from a woman who only sleeps 6 hours a night. I am one of those strange people that really does need 8 hours of sleep! As with any realistic plan for improvement it requires changing habits. An extremely difficult thing for any one to do, myself included.

So as much as I would like to spend each evening practicing my writing skills on this blog, the demands of my work and personal life have to be meet. On the blogs that I visit regularly, I am impressed with how often those bloggers post. How do they make the time? Am I just a slacker that I can't do it all?

How do you manage it? Comments any one?

Delusions vs. Daydreams

The other day my husband asked me why I call this site Self Delusions and I told him it was because it sounded more interesting than Daydreams. After all, people who have delusions of being important use important sounding words. The same day I logged onto the Internet as was greeted by the following quote:

"Nothing causes self-delusion quite so readily as power."
Liu Binyan

Truth is I really don't have much power so that couldn't be the cause of my delusions or daydreams. After doing a bit more searching I found this quote which is closer to my situation:

"Delusions may be the only things which render life tolerable, and, as such, are jealously defended against all the assaults of reason."
Anthony Storr

My most jealously defended delusion is that something I have to say may be helpful to another human being. I've always thought this was proof that I am genuinely a good person. While listening to a radio program, I learned that many altruistic actions are really quite selfish. Perhaps the person doesn't want to feel guilty or wants others to see them as a good person. I think I fall into both categories. So, now I wonder if anyone does anything for unselfish reasons? Maybe we are all self-delusional?

Truth is I have thought about writing a book (or books) for years now. My thoughts have bounced around several topics. However, this small venture into writing a blog didn't start until one day I read the following quote:

"We can think a thought to death but only when we move upon the thought do we bless human lives."
Thomas S. Monson

Suddenly, I was feeling guilty that someone out there in that great big world needed my wisdom and I was selfishly keeping it to myself out of pure laziness!

Let the delusions continue!

**UPDATE 8-6-2014 - I now have a different and not very positive opinion about Thomas S. Monson who is the current president of the LDS religion.  Once I found the LDS religion to be based upon a fraud, I tend to consider the higher-up leaders to be nothing more than very successful con-artists.

Blog Browsing

As I move past the dark mood that overtook me during the Memorial Day weekend, I am looking for insights on what makes a good blog. After all, if I am to achieve the self-delusion of people actually reading what I write I have to let my future readers know that I am here.

Is it appropriate to blog about my journey through blog world? What the heck I'm going to do it anyway.

Upon reaching the blogger login page, I notice their most recent addition to Blogs of Note: Once Upon a Feast I love food so I had to check it out. The pictures of the food were awesome and really made me hungry for some good Italian pasta. Then I noticed that the site had been nominated for Best Food Blog by Blogger's Choice Awards. What's that?? I had to check that out at: Blogger's Choice Awards They have lots of categories to chose from and because I am a sucker for cute animal pictures I checked out the Best Animal Blogger Cute Overload Definitely, a fun site for cute animal pictures. That didn't hold my interest too long and I returned to check out the Best Blog about Blogging. Only I didn't actually look at any of the blogs because I knew that I would stay for a while and I really just wanted to make a quick post before going back to my real life. Then I saw the category for Best Photography Blog and I had to see what was there. My husband sometimes thinks about quiting his day job and going professional with his photography and so I like to check out the competition. I looked at a couple of sites but the one I really enjoyed was The Pioneer Woman. I do think her pictures are nice but my loyalty must remain with my dear husband. What I liked was the stories she told. Perhaps because they remind me of my early years growing up on a farm. Her descriptions of her husband were right on target; she could have been describing one of my cowboy brothers.

After several hours, I realized that I still hadn't posted to my blog and I'd spent much more time than I had intended. Blog browsing can be very time consuming and quite addictive. So, perhaps on another journey through the blog world I'll actually learn how to publicize my site.

Memorial Day

When I was a child, Memorial Day was spent visiting the graves of family members who had passed on. I moved away from home over 10 years ago and haven't had any graves to visit. For me Memorial Day has just become a welcome break from work; except for this year.

This year, my nephew is serving his second tour in Iraq. He is home with his wife and three children for two weeks leave and I got to talk to him briefly on the phone. It was good to hear his voice particularly because he sounded happy. Sure, he would be happy to be home visiting his family, but I was listening for any hint of trouble in his voice.

Of course, I worry about my nephew losing his life in Iraq. I also worry about him losing himself. I know people who were in the Vietnam War and the stories they tell make me worry for my nephew. My uncle was in the Vietnam War and when he returned his wife once woke him from a bad dream only to have him knock her out cold. In the dream he was still in Vietnam and he just reacted. My uncle was able to work through the damage that had been done to him during his tour of duty, but not all veterans have been so lucky.

Memorial Day is a day of remembrance and I wish that the leaders of our country had remembered the horrors of Vietnam when they were so eager to "save" Iraq. I am no expert on the Vietnam War but I have taken the time to learn a bit about that time in our history. For those people who think our country is so virtuous, the history of the Vietnam would be a surprise. It is not that I don't appreciate the freedoms that I enjoy in this country; I have just recognized that we are not perfect. With that understanding, we should learn from our mistakes to ensure that another generation is not scarred by a tragedy such as Vietnam.

It is also important to recognize that it is not just our people who are scarred. Many people across Southeast Asia were harmed by our actions during the Vietnam War. I recently visited Laos and I was troubled to learn that Laos was the most heavily bombed country in the Vietnam War. US pilots dropped bombs on Laos just to get rid of the bombs before landing in Thailand. Can you imagine how the people of Laos felt about that? Particularly when many of the Hmong hill tribe people were fighting the Viet Cong with us. The US secretly placed service men in Laos despite a Geneva Convention Agreement that Laos remain neutral. How can we ask other country's to abide by international law when we don't do it ourselves. Our careless actions such as these are often fueling the hatred towards the US.

It is my sincere hope that our leaders will make better decisions regarding foreign policy. We can not continue to act like the big school bully even under the guise that we are doing it for everyone's good. Not only is it not true, but everyone sees through it.

Vietnam: A Television History

In Love and War: The Story of a Family's Ordeal and Sacrifice During the Vietnam Years

Why a Pen Name

It goes along with the self-delusion that my writing may actually be good and people may actually read this blog. If people do read this blog and I used my real name then my real friends and family may hear about it. I want to be anonymous so that I can say what I think with out worrying how the people I know will feel about it. I am really not a false person just very sensitive about offending those I love and I know that many of my opinions disagree sharply with the beliefs held by most of my family. I think they know it too because there seems to be an unspoken agreement that we don't talk about certain subjects.

To start off this blog, I want to share why I chose the name that I did. I named myself after three women who had a significant positive effect on my life.

Angela is the first name of my first true friend. I could say that she saved my life because she befriended me when we were in middle school and at that time I was considering suicide. She didn't realize it but she made me give life a second chance. She was an angel to me.

May is my older sister's middle name. This sister practically raised me and we share a close bond. I always knew my sister had stuck up for me in the rough and tumble family we had but I didn't realize what it had cost her until I confessed to her that I had been sexually abused by our brother. Turns out that when I was just a baby she was being sexually abused by another brother. When my mom and dad went away she would go and hide from my brother. She would hear me crying and she would come out of hiding to protect me even though she knew my brother was making me cry just to get her to come out.

Packard is the maiden name of my mother-in-law and the contribution that she made to my life was raising a son that is respectful, loving and understanding. Being from a family where the boys were cruel and self-serving made me appreciate what it takes to raise good children. I'm sure my father-in-law had a hand in the raising of my good husband as well but none of his name worked for my pen name.

So, now you know the other reason why I'm using a pen name ... dark family secrets. But don't jump to conclusions just yet. In everyone there is good and bad.